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Hey baby, wanna take a walk in my pants?

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Gentlemen, gather here for a little talk.

I know valentines is around the corner, but this little piece is not for Valentine’s day only. Men, taking a girl out on a date to your local, or a bar is not ideal.

Let me tell you a little story….

I once had a chat with this fine dude. He had nice English, and texted really nice as well, so when one fine morning I said yes to his coffee invite, I expected him to show up looking good. You know, clean up nice, and all. What I didn’t expect is him showing up in a nylon oversize tracksuit that had an elastic band resting above his ankles, cowboy boots and 2 washed out sweaters.

Anyway, long story short, I never saw him again. Not his choice, but mine.

Moving on, I want to detail a few places you should not think of going for your first date. You go for dates to know each other and decide if a second date is worth it- and there is no better way to spoil your chances of getting to know her more, or getting into her pants -if that’s your intention- than choosing the wrong venue.

Don’t take her to:

The Mall

Westgate mall

Unless your date is 7 and gets excited by the mere thought of strolling in and out of clothing stores checking out discount coupons, then you both deserve each other. Simply put, a visit to the mall is not a date. You want to appear cultured -not a confused teenager- especially if you are asking a cultured lady out for a date. Even teenagers don’t think hanging out at the mall is cool.

Sonford and KFC

KFC

Maybe she loves her seasoned chicken more than she loves her body, but please don’t make her feel like a broiler being fattened for marination later. A fast food joint is a bad idea for a first date. If you’re both in campus and surviving on a tough budget, the joint would be a little ideal, and you get a C for effort. However, if you’re asking a grown woman for a date, this isn’t it.

Movie Theatre

Imax

While this sounds a little cool for introverts like me who will do anything to avoid awkward conversations, don’t take your date who loves talking to a movie theatre unless you have no intentions of showing off your conversing prowess. If she’s talkative and was looking forward to knowing more about you, she might not like this date because it screams ‘IDGAF.’ Take her somewhere you can converse, look at her and compliment her. But me, take me to the theatre. I’ll enjoy sitting in the dark for 2 hours and ‘accidentally’ touching your fingers as we chew on popcorns. How’s that for first date flirting?

Shooting range

Kenya Association of Archery

You know if she doesn’t like you at a glance, she’ll shoot and shoot and shoot.

Bad bad idea!

Museums and National Parks

National Museums of Kenya

You’re going on a date, not a history lesson. Unless you both met in an anthropology class or are relic hunters, stay away. Even anthropology students need a break from all the  ‘anthropologing.’ Also, game parks are perfect for kids who think animals are so cute. Sit this one out and wait for when you get kids.

Your birthday party

Birthday party

Your birthday party should be reserved for when she has met your friends and you’ve all gone for several dates. Asking her to show up for your birthday or any other party as a first date will be extremely awkward and lonely for her. Don’t make her wish she’d rather have converted her huge karai into a bathtub, and spent her evening or day tapping her feet in the ‘bathtub’ and drinking Corona instead of being with you. She shouldn’t be getting an occasional wink as your friends drag you from corner to corner singing…..no yelling….to Ed sheeran’s lyrics:

Maybe tonight I’ll call ya
After my blood turns into alcohol
No, I just wanna hold ya

No honey, the only thing you’ll be holding after such a night is your pillow.

Book Club

Book club

Really? I know y’all love reading but all that reading you do should count for something, right? You can’t read all that fiction and participate in literacy book challenges and not be creative enough to take her somewhere interesting. Just because she loves reading and you met at a book club or launch doesn’t mean her ideal date is a book thing. People have life outside some of their interests. Humor her.

Your Car

probox

Please don’t take her for a ride in your car.

Your Place

Unless this is a sex date, don’t mention your place. Worse still, don’t make her dress up, don’t pull up at her place, don’t ask her to take an uber, don’t ask her to drive to your place. It is disrespectful, boring, lacklustre and cheap.

Your Pants

‘Hey baby, wanna take a walk in my pants?’ This is not a pick up line. This is a kick in the teeth. This is humiliating. This is just cringe. Dial it back, Pete. This will not work.

Good luck!

 

 

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Lifestyle

Diamond’s hit song ‘Cheche’ pulled down from YouTube

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Diamond Platnumz’s collabo with Zuchu Cheche was recently pulled down from YouTube following a copyright strike by a person identified as Tony Anthony. Although little is known about Tony Antony, some netizens are speculating that it could be a conspiracy to take down the fast-rising Zuchu.

However, according to the Head of Digital Department at WCB Wasafi Kim Kayndo, they are in talks with the YouTube management to ensure the Cheche video is put back on the streaming platform. He added that the copyright strike issued against the video is fake, and therefore it will be easy for them to get the video back on YouTube.

Mr Kayndo further said that if indeed the claim was legit, it could have come from a reputable copyright body and therefore, reassured fans that the video will soon be back on YouTube soon. The song in question was trending at No. 1 both in Kenya and Tanzania and had garnered over 2.5 million views within five days of being released. This comes barely a week after fans turned the heat on Diamond Platnumz and Zuchu for allegedly copying Tanasha Donna’s lyrics in the said song.

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Lifestyle

Dr Love: How do I know she loves me??

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It is entirely true that love just happens. But it is also not easy to genuinely bond with someone. Certainly to love someone deeply is a very complicated thing. And one of the biggest reasons behind it is that it is very much difficult to understand the signs of how the other feels when in love.

When it comes to loving deeply, women are highly secretive, and it takes them time to admit their feelings. But if you carefully observe their behavior, they do leave some signs, and ways behind that reveal how they feel.

Nervousness Indicates Deep Love

It is natural for anyone to fall in love to feel nervous deeply. And this change in the behavior is often readable. So if your girlfriend shows signs of nervousness, it means you are inevitably going to win her over.

She Shows Signs Of Jealousy

A woman in love will many times reveal shocking signs and display her jealous side if you are talking to other girls or unknown women. It is because she considers you more than just her friend and is scared of losing you to someone else.

She Always Tries To Keep You Happy

Does she always try to keep you happy and make you smile? When a woman is genuinely in love with a man she will try everything to keep him happy. She may even display a good sense of humor and go out of the way to ensure that you are always smiling.

Social Media Displays Her Love Interest

It is always easy to find out the deeply hidden feeling of your girlfriend by getting a glimpse of her activity on social media platforms such as Facebook, Google +, Twitter and Instagram. If she likes and comments on your post regularly, these signs indicate that she is deeply in low with you and wants to come closer.

She Is Always Ready To Hear You

One of the most visible signs of being in love is always being attentive to the words of your partner. You only listen to someone with great intent when you feel genuinely for someone. These are the signs that a man must recognize to identify true love.

You Are More Important Than Others

Have you seen her giving more importance to you over others? When a woman prefers your company more than other, these are her ways of showing how deeply she loves you. It can be anything from sharing food, discussing problems or even asking opinion-but if you are the first person she prefers to talk to, these are the signs that she is deeply in love with you.

Does She Discuss With You New Things?

Does she discuss new things with you whenever you meet her? It is also a vital sign that she is deeply in love with you. If she brings up a new topic every time and discusses with you even smaller things of her life, then it is one of her ways of showing you how deeply she is in love with you.

Presents For No Reason- Signs Of Being Deeply In Love

If she is giving you presents occasionally for no reason at all, then it is an indication that she is indeed profoundly in love with you. Because there can be no other reason why she should be showing signs of surprising you with gifts and presents.
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Lifestyle

This Man Dennis Okari

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Dennis okari is one of the best investigative journalists we have in Kenya. Through him, a number of scandals that would have gone past the public eye have been addressed. The most recent one, the covid 19 millionaires shook the government after he uncovered the embezzlement that had happened with the covid funds.

Dennis went to the Kenya institute of mass communication where he got his bachelor’s degree in communication- journalism. He has worked in different companies and reported in different languages. That includes the kenya broadcasting corporation, metro tv, TBN Africa and the standard group media. Currently he works at the Nation group media and is a news anchor as well as an investigative journalist and reporter.

He was married to former k24 news anchor Betty kyalo but their union lasted for only six months. Betty kyalo’s brother did hint to the media that there was abuse in the relationship as well as no support from Okari’s family. It seemed like his family did not support the union. However, both of them did not come out to the public about their break up or what caused their divorce so nobody knows what their side of the story. The two have a four-year-old daughter named Ivanna.

Dennis remarried after divorcing Betty Kyalo. He married a lady named Naomi joy who works at bonfire adventures. The two go to the same church and seem to be happy and lost in love. Their wedding was an invite only affair that was done last year in February at Ridge-ways baptist church. They have since already celebrated their first anniversary together.

Okari is a good chef in his kitchen. He once posted a picture of food he was preparing for his wife after she came home late and tired from work. The food looked very appetizing hence we can tell the man does know his way around the kitchen.

He is one of the highest paid personalities in the country. Though we cant exactly tell his net-worth, we can tell the man does pocket a handsome pay quite often from the luxurious life we see he lives on his social media pages.

Dennis is a bilingual reporter and worked for the BBC where he used to take home a salary of 800,000 per month. He covered issues of governance, security and feature stories. He however came back to seek an opportunity at the nation media group.

Dennis was recently appointed as the special projects editor at nation media effective from January twenntieth of this year. He clearly is doing a good job if his bosses entrust him with such big roles. The man has a professional experience of 12 years and counting.

Dennis okari is a forex trader and a coach as well. One can tell from his social media pages that he is deeply invested in the trade.

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